Separate Finds
by Realm Recker
Summary: Squall and Rinoa haven't seen each other for two years. But after Rinoa arrives in town and introduces someone special to Squall, he's had enough and Squall decides to bring on the hilarious antics. *Squinoa*
1. My New Car

**Two Years Later**

The feelings that were boiling up inside me were astounding. I couldn't think straight, and I couldn't even walk properly. Even if it _was_ only for a split second, my mind couldn't react to what was going on around me. I had seen _her_. For the first time in two years, I had seen her. And I couldn't respond. She was right in front of me, sitting on a bench, looking plenty content just reading the paper. I blinked, and she was gone. 

I took a step towards the bench that used to occupy the girl I knew. I kept placing one foot in front of the other until I reached the hard oak. I ran my fingertips slowly across the smooth grained texture. 

My mind searched for some explanation to what I had just seen. _… Is my mind playing tricks on me…?_

I breathed in the icy air and felt a shiver go down my spine. _Was that really Rinoa…?_ I glanced around, watching the people pass right by me, acting as if I didn't even exist. I decided to head in the direction that my mind lead me to believe was her former path. 

After an hour of aimless searching, I decided to call it quits. Rinoa was in Timber, not in Esthar. I had seldom heard from her, the last time she placed a call to my house was to congratulate my father on yet another four years of presidency. 

The year after Rinoa and I broke up, my father invited me to come stay with him at the Presidential Palace. Zell and Irvine both thought it would be a good idea for me to start treating Laguna like my father. Obviously, I accepted his offer. Now things between Laguna and I couldn't be better. We were finally reunited as father and son, and after he had explained the situation he was in during my younger years, I had forgiven him. I was happy for once. 

Today is an exception. I had seen_ her_. 

I stuffed my hands into my pockets and decided to head home. Things weren't going well for me at the moment, I was beginning to have delusions and plus I started to think I was getting frostbite. Well, that's only normal since it is winter. 

I turned my head to look up at the clear December sky. A flash of light shot across the sky at speeds I couldn't even imagine. _A shooting star…_ Rinoa and I had met because of a shooting star. _Is this… a sign? _I shook my head quickly, dismissing any thought I had come across. 

"Squall, glad to see you!" my father chimed from the entryway. Laguna was resting peacefully on the grand staircase, with his legs sprawled out and his arms dangling loosely on the carpeted steps. 

I handed my coat to the butler and sat down on the stairs with my dad. "Yeah, and why is that?" I said melancholy.

Laguna rubbed his head, "You see, Squall… I just got a call from one of your friends."

"Zell?" 

The president looked at me. "Nope. Keep guessing!" he said cheerfully.  

I sighed. I hated these guessing games he made me play, he was like an over achieving two year old. "Irvine?" I said, quietly. 

He slid his fingers along the stubble of his chin. "Nah, keep at it! You're getting warmer." 

I kept rubbing my hands together to try and heat them up, after being out in the cold for so long, it takes a while for your hands to get—well, not blue. "Selphie?"

He shook his head. I looked down at a maid passing by. _Dad… you are just moronic sometimes, I have no idea how any person in this free world would elect you president for a second time…_

I chuckled at my next guess, "Quistis?" Yeah, right. Quistis never uses the phone, even if it's necessary. She'd rather go 'see' the person. I must admit though, she does use the phone on occasion, like the time I got my forehead slashed by Seifer.

"Not even close!" 

I knew it. But wait, no one was left. I raised my eyebrows and turned to my dad. "Um, dad…" I still had trouble calling him that. But, I was getting used to it. "There's no one left," I replied wearily. 

Laguna blinked, "Oh! You must have guessed it already!!" he laughed nervously. 

I growled into my hands. _I swear…_

"Repeat who you named again. I'll double check." He said with a bright smile on his face. _Ack! How can he be so cheerful all of the time!? _I stared at him, blankly. 

"Uh, Zell."

"No, no, wasn't him."

"Irvine, Quistis, and Selphie. Take your pick," I kept my eyes on him, almost wanting to choke him if he asked me to repeat them a third time. 

"Well, it wasn't any of those people. Do you have any other close friends?" he enquired. 

Okay, that was it. I had enough. There was no one else! How was I supposed to— "Rinoa…?" I swallowed the words back into my throat. 

He perked up, "Yes, I believe that was the one!!"

I hesitated. _Wait… Why would she be calling? She hasn't called me for six months…_ "Did she leave a number?" I asked quickly. 

"Yep! I wrote it down by the lobby phone." This was the first time ever that I just wanted to scream at my dad, 'you're the best dad in the world!' Well, besides the fact that I had a huge urge to strangle him after making me play the 'guessing game', when he could have just told me. 

I ran quickly to the lobby and halted in front of the phone. My eyes quickly darted over the table that held the phone. There was no slip of paper anywhere to be found. _Damn…_

"Dad!!" I called from the lobby. Laguna came skipping in, which acted too much like Selphie, thus it scared the living hell out of me. I pointed at the table, "Where did you write it down at?" I glanced over the table one more time to make sure I didn't miss anything. 

He trotted over to the phone and looked over my shoulder. "Hmm… I could have sworn I wrote it down…" 

I slapped my hand to my forehead and plopped myself down on the couch. "Why do you always lose things!?"

Laguna played with his shirt, a habit he always seemed to do when he was nervous. "I- But, I could have sworn… Squall, I'm sorry, I must have lost it." He replied, staring at the phone. 

I stood up and waved my hand to catch his attention. "Don't worry about it…"

He nodded and plastered his goofy grin back onto his face. "Well, I have some work to do!! I better head on up to my office. Oh, and Squall… I believe there's something waiting for you outside."

My face must have looked distorted because he giggled. Yeah, he giggled. Amazing that he's my father, isn't it? I watched him begin his journey up the staircase, before I turned and headed outside. 

The sight awaiting me outside did surprise me. In fact, I think I actually smiled. Genuinely smiled. Can you guess what it is? No, I'm just joking. You don't have to guess, I wouldn't put you through the misery my father does everyday with the 'guessing game'. 

It was a car. 

That's right. A car. I had to give a lot of credit to my father, this was a sports car and I'm sure it cost him a pretty penny. I had never owned a car before because of my ex-position in SeeD. But now that I'm out of that job, I can finally own my own car. Thanks to my father. Isn't he a great dad? I think so. 

I ran happily over to my brand new car. I was beginning to remind myself of my father. It scared me sometimes. I shuddered quickly as I approached the car; just the thought of me acting like my father gives me the creeps. 

I scanned over the metallic black of my car. The top was down, which I'd have to kill my father for because, number one: It was snowing, and number two: It was winter, and finally number three: It was snowing. But the killing can wait till later. I must worship my new car first. 

I reached for the door handle when I heard a call from the entrance of the palace. I turned quickly in the direction of the voice. An older man, I'd say about in his 50's, came running toward me at full force. I jumped back against the car, setting off an alarm. I swallowed hard. _Good thinking, dad… Turn the alarm on when it's your own son's car, but leave the top down. Freaking moron… Mental note to kill my father later…_

The man scooted to a stop in front of me and bent over, gasping for air. All he got though was freezing cold air, so he ended up coughing instead of regaining his breath. His voice came out raspy, but clear enough to where I could hear. "Wh-what are you doing to my car?!!" he screamed. 

I grimaced, "Your car!? This is your car?!!" I was blushing, but the cold of the air was covering my red cheeks. 

The old man coughed under his breath and quickly put his hand over his mouth. "Yes, you dumb-ass! Whose else would this be?!"

"Uh, mine," I responded smartly. 

"I don't think so, kiddo!! This is my car, would you like me to show you the title?!" 

My father came running out of the house, probably hearing the screams and shouts of the old man and I. His hands were waving about in the air and his feet were scratching along the ground as he was running. "Squall, stop!!"

I didn't know what I was supposed to stop, but I just stood there. The old man watched in humor as Laguna came racing along the concrete. After he had caught his breath, Laguna stared at me. 

"What are you doing to this man's car?!" he squeaked. 

My jaw dropped, "What?! You're serious, this is his car?"

The old man crawled into his car and shut the door. He quickly started the engine, "No, it belongs to the fairies!! Yes, you bonehead, this is my car!" he said through roaring his engine. 

He zoomed off, leaving my father and I alone in the falling snow. I gritted my teeth, "I thought that was the 'surprise', father…" I said harshly. 

My dad inched back. "N-no, your surprise is right over here…" he lead me down the through the front yard and into the back. He proudly held out his hands to a go-kart. "This is your surprise! Isn't it so much better than a car?"

I glared at the go-kart, turned on my heel and stormed into the house. 

_Tick… Tock… Tick… Tock…_ I must have heard that sound for a good four hours before I came out of my room, cooled off. I still had my fists clenched however, so I could punch someone if they even began to ask what was wrong. My feet found their way down the stairs and into the darkness of the palace. I had a pretty good idea where the light switch was, so I guessed my way there. I clicked on the switch and let my eyes readjust to the newfound lighting. 

Into the kitchen I went and discovered Ms. Payton, our cook. She was already up, preparing the next mornings breakfast. I tapped my fingers along the counter and waited for her to realize I was in the room with her. 

She silently set the spatula down and cocked her head to look at me. "Mr. Leonhart, what are you doing up this late?"

"I should ask you the same question…" I said as I raided the fridge for a midnight snack. 

Ms. Payton took back to her eggs, "Well, I have to prepare breakfast."

I nodded and took out some bread and turkey slices. "Oh, by the way, please call me Squall. I feel much more human that way, I'm not a king or a congressman after all." I took a bite into my turkey sandwich. 

She laughed, "Of course, Squall. And please refer to me as Melinda."

"Will do. Anyway, why do you always get up this early to prepare breakfast when you can prepare it in the morning?" 

"So I can sleep in," she stated simply. 

"Oh." And that was all of that conversation. I finished off my turkey sandwich and tried to remain halfway comfortable through the silence that was partaking between us. I waved a small goodbye to Melinda and turned into the living room.

I seated myself on the large couch and laid back, thoroughly relaxed. I swapped up the remote and clicked on the TV. Fifteen minutes of a musical can get annoying, so I rolled over a few channels and found a nice soap opera. _Nope…_ But soon things began to get interesting on that soap opera. Some man got a girl pregnant, but the girl was already married to her father's, aunt's cousin… Or something on that order…

The bright colors of the woman on the TV's red hair dye reflected off the walls and a small shred of something glowed for a tiny TV moment. It caught my eye quickly and I sat up. I noticed it was a piece of paper. My curiosity got the best of me and I stood up and wandered over to the attractive paper. 

A few small scribbles were on it, when I bent closer to take a look, numbers started to pop out at me. I picked up the paper in my fingers and my eyes widened. _Is this… Rinoa's number?! Oh, hyne… Please let it be!!_

I began to pick up the phone when I stopped myself. _It's too late…_ I decided to call the number tomorrow and take my chances that it was Rinoa's. 

A/N: Well, what did you guys think of the first chapter? I know it's boring, but it'll get better. I hope… Anyway, please review, I'd really like to see a lot of reviews because support keeps me going. Uh, yeah… enough of that sentimental stuff, please review!

--Realm Recker 


	2. Surprises and Hot Lemonade

I had done it. I had called the number. 

Unfortunately, it was the direct number to one of my dad's closest business officials. 

The beginning of the phone conversation was my asking to talk to Rinoa. He wasn't too happy that I couldn't get the idea through my head that there was no Rinoa. The rest of the conversation was… well… It wasn't pretty. Let's just say it contained unsuitable material for ages 18 and under. 

Of course, I too was saddened by the thought that my father really was a bonehead and I didn't have anything to look forward to when I turned his age, because I would probably be just like him. The fruitcake really did lose Rinoa's phone number, either that or he didn't even bother to write it down. 

I had stayed in my room for most of the day, pouting and acting like a regular asshole. You know, my usual self. After the incident with the car and the go-kart, I was pissed enough… But finding out that the 'mysterious' number belonged to a slime ball angered me even more. 

My dad tried futile attempts at getting me to open my bedroom door. Like I said, they were futile. I finally summed up the courage to come out of my lovely hiding spot and venture outside. I didn't exactly know where I was going, but I was going to get far away from that place. 

So I found my way into the backyard. 

My sights set upon a small red vehicle, one that a six year old would be proud of. I sat on the grass for some time, just staring at my new go-kart. Obviously, one that my father enjoyed and thought that I would too. 

I let out a deep sigh and clambered into the metal machine. I pressed the ignition button and listened to it start up. _Hey… not a bad motor…_

After revving the engine a couple of times, I got my satisfaction. I decided to try my new ability as a go-kart driver. Can't be much different than driving a car, right? Boy, was I wrong…

I pressed my foot on the gas and took off sliding down the freshly watered grass. I had forgotten that our grass gets watered everyday for healthy, green grass. My foot kept stomping on the brake, trying to get the go-kart to halt to a stop. After useless pressing, my calf ached from trying to stop the senseless machine. 

After a few minutes of sliding around and tilting, I began to get bored of the thrill ride. Yeah, we have a big backyard, that's why it's taking me so long. My eyes closed as my right eye had caught sight of a tree. I didn't even want to know what was going to happen to my little go-kart, and me, I feared for the worst. 

My neck jerked sideways as the red go-kart slammed into the tree, knocking me clean out of the racing machine. I opened my eyes to discover that I was currently in the air, flying a few feet off the land. I tried to put my hands down to break my fall, which didn't help me any. I plunged hard into the ground, and heard one of my arms pop. I lay there for a while, wondering what had happened. 

I sat up and felt a string of pain shoot through my arm. Great, I had a bruise on my arm. 

I looked at the go-kart and found it twisted around the unholy tree. Some of the go-kart's parts were strung about the yard. I looked to my left and found one of its tires. I shook my head and stood. 

"This is just great, the only car I ever own and I wreck it… I don't even have insurance yet!!" I screamed at myself. The only witness that saw my horrible incident was the gardener. He didn't really matter much; he would keep his mouth shut anyway. 

I marched back into the house and found that my father was eating lunch with a smirk on his face. I sat down at the table. "What's with you, happy boy?" I said, grimacing.

Laguna shrugged and kept his smile. I pondered over his actions and blew it off. I grabbed the plate that was sitting across from me and decided to eat whoever's food that was. 

"So… Have you tested out your new car, yet?" he said, laughing to himself. 

I quickly swallowed a piece of chicken and almost choked. "I um—no, not yet…" Did he know? Had he seen me the whole time?! Nah… Laguna would probably just think that I was 'wrestling' with the go-kart instead of smashing its brains out. 

"Oh, I thought I seen you go out to the backyard," he said sneakily. 

"Well, I-I um, did! But I just took a walk, nothing more." I figured if he did find out that I wrecked his pride and joy that I would be kicked out of the Presidential Palace and disowned. So I decided to cover up as much as possible. However, I'm a horrible liar.

He snickered into his green beans. I looked at him awkwardly and continued to slowly devour my chicken. 

He paused in his eating, "One of your friends is coming over."

I dropped my fork. The last time one of them came by; the palace was in chaos for three weeks. Not to mention, I was arrested, put in the newspapers, and almost eaten by piranhas. I had never wanted any of them to come back ever again. I told them I would visit them. I guess they didn't hear me quite clearly…

"That's nice," I said. I'm such a dork.

Laguna nodded, "It's a girl."

Oh, hyne no! Please don't let it be Selphie, anyone but Selphie!! "Um, is it Selphie?" I said stupidly. 

He shook his head. 

Thank you god! Wait, Quistis? If she came, her pointless jibber jabber would hammer me!! And she would be after me like white on rice! Oh, man, she'd badger me until I swept this palace clean. Not to mention she'd make me do work!!

As if he was reading my mind, he calmly said, "It's not Quistis."

"Oh…" 

I stared at my food until realizing the only girl left was… "Rinoa!?"

"That's the one? It must be, she mentioned her name but I just can't remember," he scratched his head. I stood up from my chair and clasped my hands on his shoulders. I started to shake him wildly, temporarily forgetting that everyone in the entire palace was staring at me. As soon as they had torn me away from the process of giving my father a seizure, they sent me upstairs to prepare for our guest. Which would be Rinoa, by the way.

Three hours had passed and still no Rinoa. My father had probably gotten the date wrong. 

"You're sure she said today?" I asked. 

Laguna hesitated and scratched his chin. "Yes, I believe she did. She should be arriving anytime." He turned his head to look at the grandfather clock. 

The doorbell gave a shrill ring and I pounced out of my chair. The next thing I saw surprised me, even more than the go-kart and the fact that I wrecked it. I opened the door, expecting to see a dazzling Rinoa. 

Well, one part of my suspicion was right. She was dazzling. She had on a small jacket that fit her curves and a red top that hugged every inch of her body. I glanced down at her legs; she had a pair of little shorts on that would make any guy drool. One other thing I noticed was that her arm was connected to something. A guy.

Heat rose up in my cheeks like a flame tracing a line of gasoline. It wasn't embarrassment… It was anger. Even though Rinoa and I were broken up, only because of my cowardly attitude, and me, I was still angered by the sight of her with another guy. She smiled at me, the same smile she used to give me when we first met. "Hey…"

I looked at her friend, or so I was hoping and nodded. I turned back to her. "Hey."

Laguna was watching from his chair, motioning at me. "Invite them in, Squall."

I allowed them in and showed them to the living room. "Um, so do you guys want anything to drink?" I kept my eyes focused on Rinoa, even though I was having trouble retaining my temper with that macho man standing in the same room. 

She looked up at him, her eyes filled with admiration. "Do you want anything, hun?"

She had called him hun! I was furious, with every ounce of my temper I tried to control my anger. My dad knew I was mad, and he tapped my arm to remind me that they were our guests. 

He looked around at my house and tilted his head at me. "Whatcha got?" he said smiling.

Whatcha? What the hell… Can't the guy talk!?

I put my hands in my pockets, "Uh, drinks."

"Okay, how 'bout… Lemonade?" he asked.

I narrowed my eyes at Rinoa. "Sure thing… We have lemonade…" My dad glanced at me weirdly, he knew what I was up to, but he wasn't going to say anything. 

She watched me, "Squall, would you like some help?" I think she was pretty aware that I had something up my sleeve also. 

This would be a good opportunity to talk to her. "Yeah, I could use some help. Never know when I might need someone else to pour the _lemonade_." I said coldly. 

She let go of her boyfriend and followed me into the kitchen. She took a seat on a bar stool and stayed quiet. After I had gotten a cup out of a cabinet, she cleared her throat. 

"I tried to get a hold of you, but your father answered… I left a number, but you didn't call back," Rinoa said timidly.

"Laguna forgot to write it down."

She nodded, a few strands of hair falling around her face. "I'm sorry I didn't call and tell you before…" 

I looked at her, studying her face and taking in the changes that had taken place over the past two years. Her face had thinned, her cheekbones more defined, her body with curves that would make any man get down on his knees. I was about to hover down myself and start bowing to her. But I couldn't, I was angry after all. Not quite at her, though.

"Well, we're over… What does it matter?" I enquired without sincerity. My voice wavered, giving hint that I was upset. 

She looked down at her hands, "Squall, I'm sorry. I know you're upset…"

"I'm not upset. What gave you that idea?"

"The look on your face," she said plainly.

Dammit! That girl knew me too well. I used to be able to hide my emotions well. After Rinoa came, I couldn't do it anymore, she forced me to reveal my feelings to her. Damn her. I still get frustrated when I think about how much I've changed. I must say though, a part of me is glad that she opened me up.

"Well, you can't really expect me to be happy about it. Especially after what happened between us, I didn't think you'd get over us that quickly…" I took a pitcher off the counter and headed towards the bathroom. 

Rinoa stood up quickly and grabbed my hand. I stopped. "Just where do you think you're going?" she asked.

"To… fill up the pitcher," I smiled slyly.

She shook her head. "There better be a flowing fountain of lemonade in the other room. You better not be doing what I think you're doing, Squall."

I put my hand to my chest as if I was hurt. "Me? Not me, I would never do that…" I walked off calmly to the bathroom and shut the door. Matter of fact, I would do that.

I grinned as I set the empty pitcher on the bathroom sink. 

Well, if you didn't guess by now, you know exactly what I'm doing at this moment. I was shall we say, _filling_ up the pitcher with my 'own' lemonade. I smirked to myself and zipped my pants back up. _Well, time to serve Rinoa's little boyfriend some fresh lemonade…_

I took the pitcher back out to the kitchen and poured some into the glass. I deposited some ice cubs into the yellowed substance, which came from something known as my pissing system. 

"Mmm, this lemonade is good!" Rinoa's friend cried.

I watched him and almost burst into laughter, I glanced at Rinoa and she was giving me the death glare. "Uh, anyway… Rinoa, aren't you going to introduce your friend?"

She nodded and patted his leg, "This is Tye, and he's my boyfriend." She looked at his lemonade and gave a repulsive look. "Tye…" He turned to her.

"Yeah?" he asked while sipping my lemonade.

Rinoa bit her lower lip, "Please brush your teeth when we get back to the hotel…"

Tye shrugged it off and continued his drinking. "Squall, damn, who made this?"

I rolled my eyes. "I did."

"Seriously?! Whoa… This is some good lemonade!" Tye grinned.

"Gee, thanks. It's homemade," I laughed at my remark and got my father to snort too.

My dad was being pretty quiet throughout the conversation, but he couldn't resist when I made that last comment. "Squall, my boy… Why don't you offer Tye some more lemonade? I'm sure he would like some." Laguna said mischievously.

I smiled at my dad and looked at Tye. "Yeah, would you like some more lemonade? There's still at least half a pitcher left…" 

Rinoa shook her head and stood up to catch Tye's attention. "It's actually getting pretty late! I didn't realize the time…" she said, looking at her watch. "We should go, Tye."

He set his empty glass on the table. "But, we just got here 10 minutes ago…"

"Tye! It's been long enough!" she exclaimed.

Tye hurriedly stood up and headed toward the door. He opened the door and went outside like a dog with its tail between its legs. I waved at the door, smiling to myself.

"Rinoa you have to leave so soon?" Laguna enquired. 

She turned and hastily walked towards the door in Tye's footsteps. "Afraid so… Your son can't seem to handle his childish ways. One reason why we broke up," she said, glaring at me. I sunk back into my chair.

"I'll see you later, maybe…?" I said, looking at her in a cowardly way.

Rinoa sighed and nodded her head. "I'll call you, maybe we can talk."

And that was that. 

Two weeks had passed and I began to think that Rinoa had forgotten all about me. No phone call, no visit, not even a letter. I let out an exasperated sigh and played with my shirt. I picked up the remote and flicked on the TV in my room. 

"Boring…" I said to myself. I finally rested on a channel. It was Esthar's Funniest Home Videos. Hyne, I loved that show! It's hilarious to watch some stupid ass people beat the shit out of their dogs with a canoe, or something on that order. I laughed, watching one of the movies that had just played.

Some moron was driving his go-kart and twisted it around the tree. Not to mention the guy was flying like six feet in the air! I laughed again. Suddenly all my humor was gone when I recognized the scene. That was me on the TV screen!!

I heard faint laughter from downstairs and pulled myself off the bed. I ran downstairs and found my father pointing his finger at the TV and laughing like a mental patient. He was watching the same exact thing I was.

"Squall, look at you!" he said through laughter. He knew it was me all along? Who was the reject that sent me in!! How did they even capture me on tape?! No one was there!!!

"Dad, how did you know!??" I screamed.

He smiled to himself and pointed up to a camera resting in the corner of the wall. "Security cameras! There was one in the backyard and when I saw this, I couldn't resist!!" he said, giddy with delight. 

Oh, that little rat bastard!! He turned me in! My own father turned me into some bozo ass 30-minute video segment! I could have killed him!! 

"Looky, looky!!" he said pointing at the screen. "They're playing it again!!"

I took the remote and smashed it against his head. He gave a small laugh and collapsed on the couch. "That shows you, you monkey ass moronic idiot!!" I ran upstairs in a heap of anger. 

My father was taking it easy the next few days, the doctor said he had a concussion and should rest up. This was bad news to me of course; I thought I had killed him. But no! I only gave him a concussion!! The result could have at least been amnesia! Did I get that? No, I got a lame concussion!!

I sat on the couch with my woozy dad and stared out the window. He was proudly holding my video tape recording in his hands and kept glancing at me to make sure I didn't smash anything else over his head. 

Laguna howled in laughter. "I'm having some friends over and I thought it would be a great idea to show them your Academy Award winning video tape!" he held the tape up proudly. I grabbed it from him and shoved it into his mouth.

"Oh, look at that… It's ruined, guess you can't show it anymore!" 

My dad pulled the tape from his mouth and looked at it. Saliva was dripping off the corners. "Ah, ah.  I made a copy!" he said proudly. He resumed in laughing and pulled the copy out from under the couch. I quickly snatched the copy and threw it out the window. 

"Too bad. No more copy. I'll see you later dad, I'm going out."

I walked solemnly down the streets, glancing up every so often at an unfamiliar face. I wasn't really paying attention to where I was going, so I bumped into a few people. Did I care? Nope, I was in a bad mood. Rinoa never called. 

She was probably out of town by now and was too busy with 'Tye' to even remember that I existed. I stuck my hands into my pockets and kept walking at a brisk pace. 

I had walked until I was on a strange street, which didn't look even slightly familiar to me. I closed my eyes, hoping that when I opened them, I would be back home. Well, that plan backfired. I wasn't home. I was lost.

I looked around. _Great…_

I jogged down the street a few feet before slamming into someone hard. I stumbled back and caught sight of the person I had run into. "R-Rinoa…?"

Okay, there's the second chapter! Enjoy and please review! Thanks for the reviews last time you little reviewers! Heh, sorry, I'll stop. Please urge me on with reviews it helps! Adios…


	3. Laxatives and Hotel Mishaps

It shocked me, it as in running into Rinoa on a lonely street, when I was least expecting it. Maybe it was my thinking about her. Hyne knows I had done enough of it. Maybe all that thinking brought this surprise on. Hell, I didn't know. But I was glad when I saw her. 

I helped her to her feet and examined her for a second, making sure she wasn't hurt. 

She brushed away a few strands of hair from her face and looked at me. "Funny meeting you here," she said quietly.

I nodded. "It is pretty funny, isn't it?"

Rinoa shrugged, "So what are you doing here…?" I could tell she wanted to get straight to the subject, trying to intend no harm to my feelings. Not that I had any…

"I'm lost," I watched her as she patted away the dust on her jacket. She looked up and laughed a little. 

"You're lost? Great situation to be in dumb-ass!" she exclaimed sarcastically. 

I clenched my jaw. "It is," I hesitated and seeing the uncomfortable fixture on her face, I added, "What're you doing here?"

Rinoa stayed silent. "I-I'm lost…" 

I smiled, "Whose the dumb-ass now?" 

"So, should we be lost together then?" she hurriedly asked. "I really don't feel like being alone on a deserted street like this…"

I shoved my hands into my pockets and started walking. "Yep." I heard her footsteps patting along the sidewalk behind me in a fit of keeping up. 

Five minutes of the walk was in complete silence, neither one of us wanting to wreck the peacefulness of the falling snow. Although I was freezing my ass off, that's pretty safe to say. I spotted a small diner across the street and pointed it out to her. She responded with a smile and I figured it meant we could go in and sit our little tin cans down and have a nice cup of java. 

We took a seat near the back of the diner, not wanting to be close to a window because we had already seen too much of the outside that it could last you a month. I unzipped my coat and she did the same with hers. She let it slide off her shoulders and into the booth. 

I waited until the waitress came before a word even left my mouth, "I'll take a coffee."

The waitress named Betty took out a writing pad from her apron and a pen. "Regular or black?" she asked annoyed. 

I glanced down at the torn up table. _Man… I could tell she didn't have a good night. _"Black, ma'am," I said cheerfully. Hoping to bring her spirits up. She smiled slightly but quickly wiped it off her face as she turned to Rinoa. 

"And for you?"

Rinoa played with her hands, "Um… I think I'll just have hot chocolate."

I looked at her strangely; she always had coffee, even when we were together. No sugar and a little cream. Something changed… 

Betty had left and I decided ask Rinoa what was wrong. "You didn't get coffee."

"I know," she said smiling.

I raised my eyebrows and let out a small whistle. "You've gone crazy, haven't you? I thought I seen you in Esthar's Most Wanted…"

She shook her head, "Nope. I think you've gone crazy."

"Why do you say that?"

She tilted her head towards the kitchen. "Cause I seen the coffee."

I looked towards where she directed and saw a waiter pouring a chunk of what looked like mud into a man's cup. 

"Icky…" I said weakly. "That's the coffee?!"

Rinoa put her fingers up to her lips to tell me to quiet down. "You deserve it."

"No I don't."

"Yes you do."

"Why?" I asked.

She wrinkled her nose, "Oh, I don't know… Maybe because you had fun urinating in my boyfriend's lemonade."

I put my hands up in defense, "Hey, there was no lemonade at all! It was all piss, you should at least give me credit for having a full bladder."

She sighed, "Men…"

"Speaking of boyfriends… Where's yours?"

Rinoa watched as our waitress returned with our drinks. I stared into the black abyss that contaminated my coffee. I stuck out my tongue. 

She took a sip of her cocoa and set her cup down on the table. "He's out…"

"He left you alone?" I stirred my chunky chunks and set down my spoon, disgusted.

"No, not entirely…" she whispered.

I glanced at my silver spoon, well once silver, now a brownish black. I looked at the funky shapes the mudslide was making onto my silver wear. "Then what?" I asked after fascination with my spoon and the weird ass coffee. Looked like someone's shit.

"Tye didn't really want to go sight seeing with me. I wanted to see Esthar on foot and he wasn't up for all the walking. Said he would stay in bed all day and still be there when I returned."

"And?" I rested my elbows on the table.

My ex-girlfriend cocked her head. "And before I ate lunch, I decided I would go back and invite him to join me. But he was gone…"

"Any note?"

She shook her head violently. 

I swallowed down my harsh words, "Oh…"

We had finally found our way to a familiar street with live people actually walking around. However, neither of us wanted to part ways. 

I kept thinking about Tye, and not in that way, but there was something about him that I didn't trust. Sure, he seemed like a great guy, probably a hit with all the girls too. There was something I couldn't quite put my finger on, something that I was missing. But what was it? I pondered over these thoughts until Rinoa nudged me in the side. 

"Hmm?" I glanced at her. 

As if reading my mind she spoke, "Tye really is a great guy, you know."

I nodded my head shortly, not wanting to say anything mean. "Yeah, he probably is." I left it at that. No conversation took place for a while. 

When we arrived back at the Presidential Palace, I invited her inside. She accepted and those were the only words spoken between us until we arrived up in my room. 

Rinoa sat down on the bed and I took a seat at my desk. "What time is it?" she asked.

I looked at my small alarm clock. "8:35."

"Okay." 

"Rinoa… How did you meet Tye?" I was hoping I didn't sound too interested.

She relaxed herself on the bed and looked at me. "It's pretty strange."

I tensed, wanting to know more. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. We met back September. There was this festival going on in Deling City and I figured I might as well go check it out and see my father all in the same day," she stopped, expecting me to ask her to go on, but when I didn't, she continued. "Well, as I was wandering around the festival and looking at the different shops, I got hungry."

I smiled. She noticed this and smiled herself, "Tye was a food vender. I met him that way. Once he saw me he said his breath caught and that he wanted to give me free food," she laughed. "So he gave me a free cheeseburger and invited me to eat with him around the back. How could I not accept? The guy was already nice enough to give me free things."

I kept a smile on my lips and urged her to continue. "We ate, and not in silence. I could hardly get him to shut up!" she grinned. "He talks a lot more than Selphie and Zell does combined. But, after we had eaten he asked for my phone number. I was a little leery at first about giving this food vender my name and number, but I couldn't resist. I scribbled it down and two days later he called. And that's that," she stated promptly.

"Interesting."

She laughed quietly and stood up, I kept my eyes on her. She walked over to me and wrapped her arms around me, enveloping me in a hug. "Thanks for listening…"

I returned the hug and smiled slightly, "I was the one that asked."

My phone rang and I slowly tore my eyes away from the girl that stood before me. I picked up the annoying device, "Hello?" I pursed my lips, "Um, yeah, hold on."

I handed Rinoa the phone, "It's for you."

She looked at me and nodded, taking the phone. "Uh, hello?" she said nervously. "Oh, Tye! Where were you? Me? I'm at the Presidential Palace…"

She handed me back the phone and rubbed her arms. "He hung up."

I set the phone down on the hook. "Sorry…"

20 minutes of non-stop talking and laughter made me wonder why I ever broke up with this angel in the first place. I listened to every word she spoke, waited for her to reply to my questions. It was only a small sum of heaven. My senses were filled with extreme happiness and excitement as I talked to the girl in front of me. I never realized until now how much of an effect she had on me. 

It was now 9:00 pm and the doorbell rang. I told Rinoa to wait in my room while I went to see who it was, but she insisted on coming with me. 

I pulled open the door and Tye was standing outside, his teeth chattering. Rinoa grabbed him by his coat and tugged him inside. She looked at him, "What are you doing here?" she demanded for an answer.

Tye finished shivering, "I-I ca-came to see you…" he said breathlessly. 

Rinoa's eyes shimmered. "You did?" she asked, almost dreamily. I crossed my arms and sat down on the grand staircase. Watching those two made me so jealous that I was about to scream out, 'He's not right for you, Rinoa! Take me!!' However like the coward I am, I couldn't do it.

Rinoa's boyfriend pulled out a dozen red roses and handed them to her, making sure she didn't touch the thorns. She kissed the man gently on the cheek and smelled her flowers. I sighed, not loud enough to hear. Maybe he was right for her. I never bought her flowers. I never bought her anything. I wasn't good enough…

We had said our good-bye's and she promised to call me this time. She left with Tye and strictly reminded him to take a taxi next time since the hotel was only a few blocks off. I remembered her looking into my eyes and leaning in, almost as if wanting a kiss. No, I was getting my hopes up. It was only a hug she yearned for.

I laid on my bed that night, completely awake, focusing all my thoughts on her. I shook my head as I recalled Tye's 'sweetness'. If Tye were right for her, neither of them would ever know it. Because I would ruin everything that guy did in an attempt to get Rinoa back. I know it's sad to have to convert to extremes, but if it would get the only girl I've ever loved back, it'd be worth it. Tye would find someone else probably in a day. So it wouldn't really matter to him. 

I just have to embarrass the hell out of the guy. 

Tuesday, December 22nd.

I left the house at 7:45 am so I could arrive at Rinoa's hotel early before they awoke. I entered through the large, gated doors and tapped my fingers on the reception desk. I called the woman's attention and she nodded at me. "How may I help you, sir?"

I cleared my throat, "Yes, I had an appointment with Rinoa Heartilly and I was just wondering if I could possibly get her room number?"

The receptionist typed in some things on her computer. "Room 278."

I smiled, "Thanks."

I walked down one hall of rooms and found that it was only in the 50's. I found an elevator and went up to the 2nd floor. Bingo, the 200's.

I glanced at every door, checking the numbers until I discovered which one I was looking for. _Here we go, room 278…_

I tapped quietly on the door and ran off down the hall. I hid around a corner and waited for an answer. The door opened and Rinoa peeked her head out, drowsiness showing in her face. I smiled as I watched her. I stuck my thumb out so she could see and jerked it toward my direction. Hopefully she would come, curious.

She did, she started walking at a slow pace, and not sure of what was beckoning her. I took off running down the corner and around another corner until I reached her room again. I prayed that I had enough time. 

I pushed open her room door and walked quietly inside. Tye was still asleep, lying peacefully on the bed with the covers bundled onto the floor. 

I grabbed a hold of the corner of the bed and easily pulled it off the box springs. I opened the balcony doors and slid the mattress outside, with him on it. It was a 2nd floor balcony, so all the cars on the nearby freeway could see everything that was going on up here. I stripped off his shirt and left his whitey tighteys on, I hurriedly tied the shirt around the banister to hold attention.

The poor guy would be left outside in the freezing cold in dirty, stained underwear. I laughed to myself as I locked the balcony door from the inside. I rushed out of the room and shut the door so Rinoa would have to go to the front desk to get her door unlocked. That way Tye would have more time to show off his pretty panties. I snickered as I left the hotel.

Wednesday, December 23

Christmas was drawing close and my dad's hopes were getting too happy for me to handle. He still believed there was a Santa Claus. See what I have to put up with?

I watched my father dance around the room, clicking his heels as he hung up ornaments on the Christmas tree. His eyes had a certain twinkle in them that disturbed me. I folded my hands over my stomach and closed my eyes.

"Tye's still going strong," I said, half asleep. I opened my eyes to look at my father; he was prancing about the room until he settled himself on the couch. My dad had known what I had been planning and he wasn't too fond of it, but he didn't go against it.

"Oh, I see."

I licked my lips to wet their dryness. "What do you think I should do next? I mean all that happened yesterday was that it made the front-page news as 'Man that skinny dipped in winter.' I need something better," I said tiredly.

Laguna stared at me for a moment, "I thought Tye was hot!"

I looked at him in a way that even scared myself. My spine crawled with possible thoughts about what my father just said. I finally had the courage to speak up. "Are you gay?!!!" I screeched.

He nodded his head slowly and smiled. I sat appalled. 

"Yes, I am gay," he added. "I'm happy."

I blinked, not sure what to make of it. _Wait… He's gay and he's happy…? He must be thinking of the other definition of gay…_ "Dad what I mean is, do you love men?"

My dad sat up quickly with a look of gagging on his face. "Hell no! Have you gone mad you little homo bastard?!!"

I sunk down like a timid bird. I rose from my chair and slowly walked to my room ashamed.

I don't know how many times I replayed the evening news with Tye's whitey tightey ass showing. You see I recorded it because I didn't get enough satisfaction from the first viewing. I sighed and shut off the VCR, thoroughly pissed that I still hadn't the least bit of humor in me from the small dilemma. Rinoa had called me later on and asked if I saw the news. Well of course I saw it, I recorded the damn thing!

I sat down at my desk and pulled out a piece of paper and a pencil. I jotted down a few things, mainly 'evil' things that I could do to Tye. Since the last prank wasn't that great. The guy wasn't even embarrassed. When the news showed Tye's face, he was laughing and smiling and kept repeating, 'Oh golly gee, I slept in my undies you see!' He didn't even care that there was this huge brown stain on the back of his 'undies'. Wonder where he acquired that…?

I shook my head in disgust. I scribbled on my paper after I couldn't think of any more evil mishaps. Well, since tomorrow is Christmas Eve, Rinoa will probably want to go view the Christmas lights around the main part of Esthar. I'd call her and find out, just in case. 

The phone rang for at least 4 times before someone answered, to my disappointment, it was Tye.

"Hey Tye. Is Rinoa there?" I asked as nicely as I could.

**"Erm, nope don't think so! Did you need something?"** he said calmly.

"Well I was wondering, what are you doing today and tomorrow?"

His silence was annoying. Finally he spoke up, **"Well tonight I think we're gonna go to dinner, would you like to come?"**

"Uh, no. And where would you be going to dinner at, just in case I might join you…?"

**"Paul's Café! Heard they got great food there, eh?"**

I wrote down the name, "Yeah sure. So what about tomorrow, what are you doing then?"

"Rinoa wanted to go see the pretty lights, I adore those… But yeah, then I think we're gonna go Christmassy shopping!!"

I couldn't stand it anymore; I was about to cry on the phone. The guy was so stupid it even hurt me! "Thanks Tye. Don't tell Rinoa I called."

**"Rodger and howdy! Greetings my fellow officer!! Hola amigo!"  **

I slammed the phone down on the receiver before he could shout out any more lousy greetings. "Fucking retard… I should admit the guy to a mental asylum."

Around 5:00 pm I decided to head on over to Rinoa's hotel just to check in. I was hoping that they hadn't left yet, but if they did I knew exactly where to go.

I walked merrily up to the reception desk, this time it was a different receptionist. I rang the bell to achieve some service. The man spun around in his chair and winked at me. "What can I get for ya, handsome?" he asked. I scooted back a few steps. 

"I um, wanted to know if Rinoa Heartilly has left the hotel yet." _What is it with gay people and I today?!_

He looked over some files and clicked his tongue. "How are you related to the guest?"

"I- I'm not," I suddenly felt very uncomfortable when the man's eyes shifted down my body.

"Mmhmm… I see… I'm afraid I can't give that information unless you have an important reason or you're related to the guest."

I swung my hand out in the air, "But the other receptionist gave me her room number!"

He shrugged, "We're allowed to do that. Just not hand out personal information, my fine sir." I leaned my weight on my left foot.

"If you really must know, I'm her attorney." I tried to look professional, "I'm checking out Miss Heartilly's case very carefully. She wanted me to accompany her to the restaurant while she interrogated her boyfriend."

The gay receptionist licked his lips. "The boyfriend who was dancing out about on the balcony? The one that was on the news?!"

I nodded.

"Oh my god, he's sooooo fine! Except for the brown stain on his panties," he chimed, lifting a finger in the air.

"Um yeah, whatever. So can you please tell me if Miss Heartilly has left her room yet?"

I could tell he was thinking. He let out a breath of air. "Well okay, but don't tell this to anyone! I'll get my sweet ass fired…" it took him a few moments to remember if she had passed.

"Well…?" I demanded. 

"I believe she did leave already, yes. Now then, how about you and me hook up sometime, handsome? You sexy, sexy man!" he said with the added extra of rolling his tongue.

I coughed and walked out of the _all-natural_ hotel. 

It took me a few minutes to get to Paul's Café, I was hoping they kept their decision and were still there. I slowly pushed the doors open and walked in calmly. I observed the people sitting at the quaint tables until my eyes locked on a couple in particular. _There we are… Nice seeing you again, Tye…_ I made a mental note to give an evil laugh later.

I rushed right past them, thanking hyne that they didn't notice me. I glided through the employee doors and grabbed a nearby waiter. "I'm Squall Leonhart, the President's son and I need to borrow your uniform."

He looked over my face, checking my identity. "Whatever you say, sir." He stripped down to his boxers and tank top and handed me his suit. 

"Thanks," I quickly put it on. I looked up at his head, "Give me your hat." The poor kid pouted but reluctantly handed me his hat. "Thanks, I owe you. If you come by the Presidential Palace anytime after Christmas, I'll give you a special tour."

He grinned and headed into the changing rooms. I followed him and looked around for some kind of disguise. I found a moose head hanging over one of the stalls and stood up on the bench to reach it. I took out my pocketknife and gingerly cut off some of the fur. 

I searched through some drawers and grabbed the duct tape, I swirled it around in a circle and stuck it on my upper lip. I pushed the moose fur onto the tape and glanced in the mirror.

"Hmm… Not bad. Now to get down to business."

I walked out into the main lobby, making sure to keep a skip to my step to disguise my normal walk. I stopped in front of Rinoa's table and smiled at them. "Have you two decided what you would like to order?" I tried to make my voice sound crackly and rough. However, it came out more of a squeak. So I figured might as well keep my valued squeak.

Rinoa looked over her menu while Tye was playing with one of the straw wrappers. "Um, I think I need a little more time." Rinoa said, tapping her menu.

I nodded weirdly and noticed Tye's glass. "Would you like a refill on your drink?"

"Yeah!" he handed me his cup. I took it and stomped back into the kitchen.

I didn't know what the hell he was drinking but I didn't really care. I set the glass down on the counter and pulled a small plastic baggy with a white powdery substance out of my pocket. And no it wasn't drugs. It was a laxative. 

I poured all of the bags contents into the almost empty drink and quickly splashed some Pepsi into the glass. I laughed quietly to myself, almost in a growl and went back out to hand Tye his glass. I was glad no one was questioning about my working here. 

I set the glass down on the table and gave a fake smile to him. "Have you decided yet?"

"Yeah, I think I'll have the chicken please." Rinoa said, smiling at me. I pulled out the pad that was in my back pocket. 

"Very well." I turned to Tye, "And for you sir?"

"I'll take a cheeseburger."

I headed back into the kitchen and placed the order on the counter. I was actually very surprised that Rinoa never even recognized me. I figured she might have thought that I looked the slightest bit familiar. I waited for about 20 minutes before the orders came out. I lifted up Tye's cheeseburger and poured hot sauce all over the bun. I crossed my arms and waited a few more minutes for it to soak in. I looked at my watch. _Tye should be experiencing that laxative soon… Better follow up with plan B._

I went back into the changing rooms and found the employee I bargained with. I asked him for the keys to the men's restroom. He handed them to me gratefully, and went back to reading a magazine.

I looked around at all the people, watching each face so they wouldn't notice me. I opened the bathroom door a little and made sure no one was in the men's room. I urged the key into the lock and twisted it until I heard a click. _There, now… Tye won't be able to get into the men's restroom… The only other option he has is the women's…_ I smirked and took a peek at the sign on the women's door. _Poor guy. Oh well!_

I had successfully delivered the orders and sat at a corner table. I watched the couple and lost my patience as Tye devoured the spicy hot cheeseburger. Stupid fag, probably so dumb he doesn't even realize the spiciness. Most people would call the fire station so they could come and have their mouths put out.

I kept peeking a glance at the clock, wondering when the laxative was going to take affect. Well, as soon as I thought that, Tye was standing up. I hurriedly turned my head to watch him, so were other people. 

He kept grabbing his stomach and moaning in pain. I laughed into my furry moose mustache. Tye dashed towards the men's restroom and tried to bust through the door, but all he found was hard wood. He ran face first into the door, and fell flat back on his ass. He rolled around for a while, unsure of where the pain was coming from. 

Rinoa rushed over to him, "Tye are you okay?! Do you need any help!?"

Tye shook his head and made useless tries at scratching the door open with his hands. He finally gave up and a loud blast sounded from his trousers. That's right, folks. He blew one. I burst out laughing and so did the rest of the restaurant, all the people there were red in the face from burning up in hysterics. Tye crawled himself quickly into the women's restroom, where he achieved even more laughter and a red faced Rinoa. And no, her face wasn't red because she was in humor, her face was red because the dumb-ass boyfriend of hers had forsaken the whole restaurant and embarrassed himself even more by flying into the girls bathroom.

All thanks to me of course.

And there it is! The next chapter! I figured out these pranks, well because I am a prankster. I pull so many pranks my mom threatens to throw me out of the house and make me live in a garbage can. But, ah well, she never means it… I think… Please review! I could use a lot of encouragement, don't worry; there'll be more Squinoa in the next chapter, plenty of it. Squall is being a jerk at this moment, as someone commented, not to worry though, he straightens himself out later… after a few more crazy mishaps, of course. Chow my fellow friends and please drop a review!


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